Confessions of a lazy therapist

January 15, 2025
4
min read
Confessions of a lazy therapist

I have a confession: I’ve learned to embrace being a “lazy” therapist.

Maybe that statement makes you cringe. Or maybe it makes you nod in recognition. Either way, if you're a mental health practitioner, social worker, or anyone carrying the weight of others' healing journeys, you likely understand the exhausting pursuit of professional perfection.

But let me be clear: “lazy” doesn’t mean careless or uncommitted. It means I focus on efficiency, simplicity, and — most importantly — self-compassion. Over time, I’ve learned that being the so-called “perfect” therapist is not just exhausting — it’s also unnecessary. Embracing my “lazy” side has made me a better therapist and a happier human.

The metaphor "It may be the same storm, but we're not all in the same boat" deeply resonates with my journey. As I weathered my own professional storms, I found myself asking not just how to stay afloat, but how to navigate these waters with purpose and grace. Because what I had been doing — exhausting myself in pursuit of an impossible ideal — wasn't just failing me; it was limiting my capacity to truly serve.

Here are five honest reflections from my path toward sustainable practice:

I’ve come through burnout multiple times.

I’ve felt true burnout. It’s not just the low feeling a couple days off and a massage can remedy, but something that requires months of recovery, and what felt like a constant uphill battle just to come back to baseline — only to find myself crashing again. I wanted to find ways that I could create sustainable balance even when client demands are high.

I don't take the lead.

Being in charge all the time is a lot of work. Instead of trying to lead every session, I meet people where they are. Letting go of the “expert” role took off the pressure and it also empowered my clients.

Shared responsibility in therapy isn’t just easier — it’s more effective. My job is to create a space for clients to take the reins and discover their own strengths. And honestly? It’s less exhausting that way.

I focus on one need at a time.

Let’s face it: as therapists, we’re constantly surrounded by deep emotions. But here’s the truth — I only allow myself to handle one crisis at a time. And I give my clients the tools to do the same. 

As therapists we hold space for a lot of things, as we show up for our clients. This means we also need to take care of ourselves, and give ourselves the time we need for self-care in whatever form that may take. 

When I adopted this mindset in my day-to-day work, it changed my life. Now, I teach it to my clients, and they’ve told me how liberating it is. By focusing on one thing at a time, we free ourselves from the chaos of trying to manage it all at once.

I don’t do the heavy lifting.

Going back to basics is surprisingly effective. I also follow a principle I love to call WAIT — “Why Am I Talking?”

Creating space for silence allows my clients to dig deep and discover answers on their own. And it saves me from the mental gymnastics of always having to “fix” things.

I also ask a lot of questions. Simple, grounding questions that call on the client: Who? What? Where? Why? How?

I lean on technology to stay organized.

I rely on technology to keep my practice running smoothly. Tools like synced calendars, automated reminders, and platforms for video sessions save me so much time and energy.

And then there’s AI — my not-so-secret weapon. With tools that help with intakes, therapy notes, and treatment plans, I can stay organized without drowning in admin work. The less time I spend on logistics, the more time I have for meaningful connections.

I notice the difference between anxiety and anticipation.

When I start feeling out of sync, I stop and ask myself: is this anxiety or anticipation?

Sometimes the difference is as simple as two neurochemicals in my brain — adrenaline and oxytocin. By getting curious instead of overwhelmed, I can reframe those jittery feelings into something positive, like excitement for what’s ahead. It’s a small nudge, but it makes a big difference.

I work smarter, not harder.

Being a “lazy therapist” doesn’t mean I don’t care  —  it means I care enough to work smarter, not harder.

These confessions aren’t about slacking off; they’re about embracing imperfection and prioritizing well-being — for myself and my clients. By focusing on simplicity and efficiency, I’ve found more joy in my work and better results for those I help.

If this resonates with you, consider giving yourself permission to be “lazy” too. You just might find that less is, in fact, more.

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Kathryn Thompson
Kathryn Thompson
Psychotherapist
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